Welcome! Here are my TOP 5 annoying things I’ve heard when I was pregnant and which I hardly refrain from saying now to my pregnant friends!
You know those movies when the hero repeatedly lives the same scenery? Well, this is what happened to me while I was pregnant and I had a chat with someone. Same pattern!
The funny thing is that now, after a few years that passed by, I’m tempted to say those things to other pregnant friends, without intending to upset them or to be self-important.
Here it is then:
1. “How do you feel?”
If I think about this question now, it is a valid question. It shows that someone cares about me and my feelings and tries to help me unburden myself.
But back then it was an annoying question. I’ll blame my hormones for it now. I thought that the answer was pretty obvious: I couldn’t eat much at the beginning of my pregnancy, I couldn’t enjoy anything because all the smell around me was making me sick (I could smell anything, from the wood of the stairs I’ve walked on to the pungent smell of the hospital, dozens of feet farther away). Then, later in my pregnancy, I couldn’t sit anymore on the sofa, I couldn’t change my position in bed when sleeping, I had to hold my breath as I turned from side to side. But how could anyone know how I feel if I don’t share it with them? And how much do I choose to share is up to me too, so I can’t expect others to know what my boundaries are if I don’t set ones
2. “Yes, you’ll see that you’ll forget how difficult it is now.”
Another annoying advice that proved itself to be true!
At that point, when I was pregnant, I was sure I would never be able to forget how difficult it was to carry two babies at the same time and to count daily, few times a day, how advanced my pregnancy is and what the statistics say. I was terrified about giving birth too early or even to lose my pregnancy.
I also had to do heparin injections my whole pregnancy, and I was doing them by myself. Some days I got bruises on my tummy because of it, other days I would hit a blood vessel. So, “forgetting” seemed impossible.
But the years have passed by and, to be honest, I miss my pregnancy and the whole time after I’ve had my babies. Now I am sorry I wasn’t more confident back then, and I feared too much. I forgot how difficult it was, indeed.
3. “Enjoy your pregnancy! You have no idea what’s expecting you…”
(I even said this one! Sorry, Ana!)
Again, annoying and unbelievable advice back then, but so right in the end!
I couldn’t enjoy my pregnancy; I was even scared to take pictures so, if something terrible happened, I could pretend it wasn’t right. Today I don’t know why I did that, I usually am a positive person, but the pregnancy changed me. We were going private to do scans so I could put my mind to rest that my babies were still there, and they were excellent. I even had a panic attack when I birthed my babies, and the doctors showed me, my first baby. He was so beautiful, healthy and strong, and I felt relieved. I felt like all the hardness on my heart just ceased. I felt like my whole struggle was only for this precise moment: to see my babies safe and healthy, outside of my body. Maybe I had this inside struggle because I fought so many years with infertility and this was the proof that I won against it. I don’t know.
But now, looking back and knowing the end of my pregnancy’s story, I wish I could’ve enjoyed more of that time.
And, yes, I had no idea what was expecting me. I work way much more than I did before having kids, but I feel less tired and way much happier than before. It’s like they are my fuel, my sparkling light.
4. “…so, sleep as much as you can. Relax!”
This one was annoying as I usually dislike unsolicited advice. And, to be honest, I hate when someone tells me to relax. It has the opposite effect on me as I get even angrier.
But now I would like to sleep a little bit more and to get a proper chance to relax!
5. “Are you ready to become a mum?”
Tough question even now, although, at that specific time in my life, I was sure that I was ready to become a mum.
In the present, I have so many things that I would change to myself concerning my children, and I question myself if I am ready now or not to be a mum for them.
For example, I wish I could just poke my fingers and have their food ready on the table instantly so I could spend more time with them. But, at the same time, I love to cook nice and healthy food for them. I need to find balance in every aspect of our lives.
Anyway, at least now I can have a glass of Margarita!